Don't try this at home
I was lucky not to have needed an off-road rescue when I made an error in judgment earlier this week. I'm darn proud of Lil Ignatz's performance, and a little irritated with my Garmin. I made the mistake of trusting a shortuct Garmin found. Road started out easily enough on a reasonably well-maintained dirt road. Trouble came when I approached what was clearly a T intersection and Garmin said go straight ahead: into nothing but trees and a stonewall. The left looked better than the right, but it ended shortly at a farm -- the last signs of civilization I'd see for a while. So I went back and took what would have been the right. First few hundred feet were on a slight downgrade that quickly turned slimey, then into the shade where what snow there was had turned to ice. (Its still mud season in parts of NH). Being a downgrade, I wasn't real eager to retreat by backing up that muddy hill. I was torn between hoping it would get better while realizing I was committed to an adventure. Half a league, half a league, half a league onward, into the valley . . .
Still trusting Garmin's guidance I continued following the little pink line it called a road. It was several miles of ups & downs on what was only a trail. A retreat was definitely out of the question -- I didn't dare lose momentum, nor was there much place to turn around anyway. The wide path between the trees (I hesitate to call it a road) alternated between mud and ice, making it a challenge to maintain enough speed to make it through the mud while not sliding out of control on the ice. Like I said, ups & downs and turns aplenty; they're not far from winter up in those deep shadey valleys. I'd taken off my snowtires a few weeks ago (just before our last snowstorm) hoping to save the tread for another winter, and replaced them with my well-worn summer LS2 tires. I wouldda breathed only a little easier if I'd had more tread. If it wasn't that some 4-wheelers had carved some ruts since the last snow, and that Ignatz has a fairly high ground clearance -- and with my guardian angel pushing -- I would have been hiking to find a cell signal. I'd really hate to explain to AAA that I had no idea where I was, and I doubt they'd help in such a situation, nor could they even get there. I took on some mud and ice I should not have attempted with only FWD, but figured I had no better chance of going back the way I came. "Portions unpaved" would be an understatement. . . try unmaintained in months and generally untraveled in recent weeks. Nice towns put up signs "Not Maintained for Winter Travel" or "Seasonal Road" so the unsuspecting motorist doesn't find himself up to his axles in mud. Had I seen such a sign, I would have turned back. Well I avoided sinking that far since the deeper ground was still likely frozen and the surface mud was shallow enough. I suppose it was only 3-4 miles of unmaintained, unreasonable, late-winter muddy road(?), but it seemed eternal. The road being so marginal I feared I'd find it gated, but no, I finally splattered onto a state highway. Phew! Something about surviving a challenge like that puts just a bit of a swagger in the step . . . for some reason my armpits seemed a little moist . . .
So, yes, I buy into that Allpar review. The Patriot is absolutely more capable than other FWD vehicle I've driven in snow, and this is the only FWD I've ever ventured into mud with, but it handled stuff way beyond what an ordinary car could, and frankly more than I wished. If I had 4WD it probably wouldn't have been a challenge. but with only FWD it was a tad scarey. But it did it!