[heckler]

http://www.jeep.ca/en/4X4TrailRated/

check out Freedom Drive I and II.

The Jeep engineers already did this for you. The 4X4 Patriot is 2wd on dry conditions.

you want to disable the rear wheels so when you chirp the front tires on pavement, they squeal? Buy a 2X4, not an AWD.

you want to disable your ABS in the winter when it's most useful? Be my guest and buy an old cherokee without advanced safety systems, just please don't rear-end me.

 

[heckler]

There's got to be a similar system in the Pat. Just a matter of finding the right wires.

which already has an ESP off function, but still can't chirp a tire?

 

[heckler]

ABS on snow or ice is literally useless, and dangerous AFAIAC. It pretty much doubles or triples your stopping distance.
I would love to disable it for winter conditions.

I'd rather be able to steer around something (which is what ABS is for) instead of slide straight into it.